You live where?

All Hallows Eve is looming. For weeks, Children of the Corn have been anticipating this last day in October. I got my decorations for the house in mid-September out of the attic; okay, I got H to bring it down so I can slowly put them up around the house to infect everyone in the family.

Last week, Child of the Corn I presented her plan for All Hallows Eve – to go trick-a-treating with her so-called BFF. They plan to have a sleepover on Saturday night. She told H that her BFF’s mother will take them to church and I immediately interjected. What? Church? Why? No. Absolutely not. The presentation stopped quicker than it started. I have nothing against churches. I just do not want her to go there with her friends. We do not go to church, we do not believe in it. We will go there if someone gets married in one or funeral services of people we know are being held there. Otherwise, no church going of our minors without our explicit supervision.

That was not all that happened. A few days ago, she went back to H and said that she wanted to spend the night at her BFF’s starting Friday night. She said to H that she told him all about it in the car while they were on their way back from breakfast. H said he does not remember such discussion. She then took her mobile phone and showed him the SMS that her friend sent her detailing the PLAN. H said, No, her parents will not even be there. He turned to me, shook his head and read out loud, “Get off the bus at my stop after school, my parents will be at a party and there will be just US.” I sighed. I did not even bother to open my mouth because it was past 7 P.M and I will not stop detailing why she should not even consider it until past midnight. Who has time or energy for such a tirade?

So why do I object to her spending time with her BFF? Apart from the fact that the parents will not even be at home that night, I object because we do not even know where she lives. That’s right. Last year, we allowed Child of the Corn I to go to a party a week before All Hallows Eve. Towards the end of the party, she rang the house and said she wanted to go to another classmate’s house round the corner from where we dropped her off and then they were going to spend the night at another person’s house, also around the corner. I asked her where exactly is this corner she will be spending the night and she did not know. She handed the phone to the girl who lives there. The girl hesitated giving me her address and gave me her mother’s phone number instead. I called the woman and started to ask if she minded Child of the Corn I spending the night there. Apparently, everything has been arranged beforehand without our knowledge. The mother then told me that her house is difficult to find and that we should meet up with them at the local petrol station by her neighbourhood the next day. H decided to let Child of the Corn I stay and I agreed. Hey, I am always the bad guy, setting what appears to be impossible limits for the poor teenager.

One year has passed and we still do not know where they live and that bothers me. We know that they live in a trailer park but that is hardly the reason why we do not wish for our child to continue being friends these people.

Last year, we decided to have a birthday party for Child of the Corn I inviting her BFFs. This particular kid whose residence is a mystery to us said she will come but did not show up.

In light of all these, I do say it is fair for me to limit my teenager’s exposure to this family. How can I in good conscience allow my kid to spend the night with a family who seem to have everything to hide from us?

At this point, I do not care if they think I am a snob or I am different because I do not believe in any church or Asian or even not an American. I am trying my best not to discriminate against others but this is too hard.

We have always made a conscious effort to be friends with everyone regardless their religious persuasion or lack thereof; their income tax bracket, their residence or skin colour, the food that they eat or their fashion-sense. Hell, H and I came from two different countries with two different religious backgrounds.

I have decided to hell with it. I have told Child of the Corn I she is not allowed to visit her BFF whose residence is a mystery to us and not to even bother asking if she could go anywhere near there.

If her BFF and her parents have a problem with it, they know where WE live, they have our phone numbers, and they can take their sorry hick arses here and ask us themselves.

You do what…?

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Now playing on Winamp: T.I. feat Justin Timberlake – Dead And Gone (RMF FM)
via FoxyTunes

Tonight was Open House at Child of the Corn II’s school. H and I always attend. Its always the same damn thing. We meet the teachers (again). Again because before school even starts, we go to her classroom to bring the school supplies and meet with the teacher/s, find out which class she will be in, etc, etc. This year is no different. Except this year, I went to the shops and H went to the school.

I went to the school alone tonight because H is working late today. No big deal – the school is less than 2 miles away.

We arrived at her classroom and found out that they were meeting at another classroom.

When I entered the classroom across the hallway, a number of parents were standing around, a teacher was seated at one of the kids’ desk, two other teachers were standing by the wall, smiling, greeting parents.

I stood at the back of the classroom – because really, I am NOT coming in contact with the children’s germs. Okay?

I later learned that the teacher seated at the desk is teaching Child of the Corn II. She was fiddling with a laptop. On the desk in front of the one she was seated in was the projector for the PowerPoint. Impressive.

Five minutes passed. One of the teachers asked, “Are we ready?”

“This is just booting,” came the reply.

I raised my eyebrows. Silence except for the kids talking to each other in hushed tones. I checked my watch. Yes, I had been standing there for 5 minutes, politely fighting off the urge to SMS/plurk/twitter anything. I looked around the classroom. Everyone was either white or blonde or white or very blonde. There were some brunettes but they were all white. They all talk fuuuny. They tried not to stare at me. I tried not to stare at them.

Another five minutes passed. A teacher at the podium said, “Why don’t you just give me the laptop? I can do it from here.”

The teacher who was fiddling with the PowerPoint said, “Everytime I do this, it comes right up!”

I raised my eyebrows again.

The PowerPoint was on the laptop screen. It did not connect with the projector. That was the problem. There was no connection between laptop and projector.

She brought the laptop over to the other teacher and the presentation began. It started off with, “Miss C had done this on the computer and it is really cute. But it is not working so we cannot show it to you.”

I fought the urge to raise my eyebrows yet again. I failed.

She began to explain how everything works – zero hour, recess, Accelerated Reading, etc, etc… topics covered in the manual that Child of the Corn II brought home on the first day of school. I did not read the manual. H diligently reads them because when his work took him away from us for months at a time, I used to read them. I got tired of the same thing. H is the responsible parent now. He is on top of things – homework, various forms to fill out, sign, seal, delivered. I just take them to school if they miss the bus or if the bus is late. Or if they need to be picked up from school due to illness or whatever.

Anyway….

My point in all of this…?

I know this is not a multi-million dollar contract that will definitely go down in flames should the PowerPoint presentation fail. This is just a presentation to parents of your students. We are nobodys. We just pay taxes every year to pay for our children’s sub par education. We cannot afford private school education for our children. We believe in the system. Some of us made or are making money off tax payers also. We are all in it together.

My point is this – for the love of god, can you just show a smidgen of dedication? Show me that you take your job very seriously? Do you not understand that these children learn from example? They are third graders. They might take the wrong message – oh, I screwed up. I can just give an excuse, “It always worked before!” Shrugs.

It also does not bode well with me that you are teaching my child. Your attitude. It is too… cavalier.

Perhaps I am just too demanding. It is after all just a night to meet your child’s teachers more intimately…

Why would you…

My plan this morning was to stay home. As the hours passed, I realised that I needed a few things so I reluctantly went to the local Wal-Mart. I went about my way, mentally trying to remember what I needed to buy. I very seldom make and carry a list of things I need to buy – I often leave them on the table at home or in the passenger seat of the car. Why do I put it on the passenger seat instead of my handbag? I often started to go astern and then something in my head screamed I left my list somewhere in the house. Five flustered minutes later, I get in the car and toss the list on the seat because if I sit around in the car any longer, I might just go back into the house and not go anywhere. Anyway, that is just me, of course.

As I was walking, pushing the trolley in front of me, I scan the surrounding for anyone I might know and need to avoid or aisles that I do not normally give a second thought to but needs to visit . Suddenly, a very large man appeared in my peripheral vision. Nothing outstanding about that – he was pushing an empty trolley like I was. I walked past the ice-cream section and recalled that I had a craving for ice cream for the past week. Normally, if I crave ice cream or anything else for that matter, I wait a few days. If the feeling passes, I do not act on my craving. This time, a week came and went and I could taste vanilla ice cream on my tongue so I had to make a purchase. That large man was right behind me, scanning ice cream as well. I thought nothing of it. I walked briskly to the next aisle and determined I needed nothing from there so I moved on several aisles over. This time, I passed the coffee aisle and paused, hearing my husband’s voice inside my head telling me he bought a few tins of coffee so I continued walking. I stopped walking and made a turn to visit the aisle that had olive oil. I have a few pots of chillies in the garden and I thought I could infuse a small bottle of olive oil so I stood there, searching for that one brand that my husband prefers. As I was staring at the various sizes and brand names, that large man was doing the SAME THING! At this point, I thought, coincidence? I stole a glance into his trolley and saw that it was still empty. I found the EVOO that I was looking for and noticed the regular cooking oil in the next shelf. I grabbed a bottle and moved on. Guess what that large man was doing? Yep. I walked briskly to the opposite end and went to the back of the store by the dairy section. I noticed he was not behind me so I breathed a little easier. Imagine my shock and surprise when I saw him by the dairy, standing there, his cart was STILL EMPTY. So I walked past him and made a detour to the home fragrance section and he was also intently looking at room fragrances. At this point, I took my BlackBerry and sent a message to a friend telling him someone was following me around at Wal-Mart. He replied, do NOT go out. Go to the kitchen department and get a big ass knife!

I am not sure if he could read SMS from afar because he is talented that way or because he thought I was calling someone or I suddenly became a bore to him but he was gone… to be on the safe side, I walked to the other end of Wal-Mart although I had no reason to do so. So I walked up and down the aisles with no intention of buying anything else, at the same time wishing I never left home almost two hours before that. Gah! Meanwhile, my ice cream was melting!!!

As I stepped outside, I stood at the exit, trying to recall where I parked (because that is what I do each time I get out of any shops) I looked around to see if this large man is laying in wait for me at the car park. I found my car and the man was nowhere in sight. Perhaps he was still inside, busy stalking someone else or actually going up and down aisles with the intention of buying something. As I sat in my car, I looked at the glove box compartment and beat myself up because I always carry a knife in there. At one point, I had a sharp butter knife lodged inbetween the passenger seat and the middle console. I also have the usual stuff people might carry in their car – torch light, CDs, Gatorade, bottle of water, empty plastic bags, an umbrella and several disposable lighters. I got to thinking – hey, I need to carry this knife on me so I could casually take it out of my handbag the next time someone accost me at Wal-Mart or anywhere else. Maybe next time also, I could hit “video” on my BlackBerry and record the stalker and send it off to the local law enforcement and FBI. What do you think?

Dear would-be stalkers, for the love of god, please, get a life and a girlfriend. You could be stalking an incorrigible need to be in constant contact with everyone soc-net junkie who isn’t the HotFish. And then what? Have your ridiculous loser self plastered all over youtube and the police knocking down your front door. That will teach you.

Why the fuck? Why?

Every year right before summer school holidays roll in, we have to either 1) fill out forms, bring proof of residency and devote at least an hour to re-register the kids for the following school year OR 2) we bring “necessary” proofs etc and spend over two hours filling up the forms at school. At a time when we could be sitting down at the dinner table at home.

If you have never registered a kid for school because they are too young or you don’t have any (yet) oh I envy you!

For proof of residency, you need MORTGAGE/LEASE statement (original), a current (but of course) UTILITY BILL, driving license/state identification card.

In addition, you also need child’s birth certificate and social security number. In this particular district, you CANNOT provide a passport although you have to provide social security number AND birth certificate AND driving license of parents to obtain this document. Not only that, there is a photo of said child on the passport!

Well of course they photocopy these SAME DOCUMENTS you provide them EACH AND EVERY YEAR. Not only that, they KEEP these documents in the child’s folder. These folders GROW each year.

So what, you say? Not like they are storing these folders in my house, right? Can you think of all the unnecessary time, effort and money that are WASTED EACH YEAR? Don’t the teachers and school administrators have anything better to do? WE parents have better things to do. Come on!

Why can’t the school district just issue a reminder to everyone who have moved to update their addresses each year?

This really irks me because it is wasteful behaviour. Utterly unnecessary. Why are our tax dollars spent in this manner?

So much for saving resources.

Monkey see…

Yesterday was Earth Day. I must admit I am not an avid follower of various Days that people celebrate. Unless it has to do with my religion but that is another story.

Over the past few weeks, Child of the Corn II has been (sort of) stacking  discarded items. Actually, she was not stacking them, she just keeps them instead of putting them in the bin. She screamed each time I pick them up and head towards the refuse container. Turned out, she was collecting them for Earth Day. I asked her what she intended to do with these things and she mumbled something about recycling them for Earth Day. Apparently her class has been preparing for Earth Day and she was doing her part.

Don’t get me wrong, I like that children are being taught to respect the earth, recycle and so on. Sometimes, however, recycling discarded items are just not possible. We live in the country and there is no such thing as a recycling centre. I am sure there is one here somewhere – I just haven’t bothered to check. That said, we are not offered to have certain items sent to recycling section or not. EVERYTHING goes to the same place. The garbage people come once a week and we only use one type of container. That’s it.

I am not losing sleep over it, though.

We have a dishwasher but we only use it once or twice a year. Why? We are saving water and electricity. You may argue we use more water washing dishes by hand. (Hey, I am sure SOMEONE will come here and provide the appropriate links to substantiate their claim.) I just prefer to use as little electricity as possible. If I run the tap to wash my dishes by hand and rely on the sunshine coming into my kitchen window, I am saving electricity. Correct?

Many people who know me by now realise that I seldom (if ever) run the air-conditioner. I don’t even turn on the A/C while I am driving around in my car. The reason? Air-conditioners tend to keep you dry (as opposed to breezes and the fan) and being dry means you need to moisturise artificially. That is not to say I do not buy lotions and potions. Far from it. The thing is, not only am I using MORE lotions and potions, I am also spending more money on electricity to run the air-conditioner. If everyone within the grid turn on their air-conditioner all day and all night in the summertime, can you imagine what happens?

Yes, opening the windows invite dust into the house. Unless you are terribly allergic to a bit of dust, it isn’t going to kill you. You need the exercise dusting your furnitures anyway. Right?

I think recycling is great. Teaching kids about it is fantastic. However, can we also teach our kids to save everything in general? Such as eating last night’s leftovers for breakfast or lunch instead of throwing them away? (Unless you are composting them. In that case, carry on) We generally give babies baths simply because they cannot stand up. However, as soon as they are able to stand up straight and hold on to something, can we teach them to take short showers instead to save water?

Use and re-use envelopes that come in the mail instead of spending money to buy those cute notepads to scribble stupid notes that you will lose anyway? Obviously, you use the back of the envelope to jot down little notes for that one time use and when you are done with it, you shred it and send the shredded envelopes along with shredded documents etc to the local animal shelter. OR use the shredded papers to make an art project or something. Huh?

I just sometimes wonder if people “celebrate” Earth Day really understand that it is not a once year thing. It is a lifelong commitment. Much like celebrating Valentine’s Day and such like.

I mean, once a year, you get hyped about this special day or that special day and then the rest of the year, you don’t think about it. You don’t even care. What is the point, really?