Some people like to plan for everything in their lives. Others just wake up every morning and decide what to do when the time comes. There are also those who plan for some things but let other aspects of their lives take shape as and when it needs to.
I am that person who wakes up every morning and decide what will happen. I do admit some things need planning and I am not very happy about that at all; for instance, having to book tickets for a flight or hotel rooms and arranging car rentals, and the like. I find it very taxing and I put them all off as much as I can. H however, likes to plan these things to its tiniest detail. Whenever we had to move and I had to book hotels for our temporary lodgings, I always find the perfect excuse not to do it right away. I will wait for him to plot our route and pick the dates. I find that when other people are scrambling to do something, I get motivated to get off my arse and get in the mood to do it.
Once, H was gone and I had to do everything including arrange for the movers to come at a certain date, cleaning the house from top to bottom, collecting the kids’ medical records from various doctors, finding accommodations, changing the tyres to my car, and everything else that goes with a long-distance travel. I got into panic mode for about a month. Then I began to get brilliant ideas that turned out to be major failures, having to go back to square one – panic. Eventually, I decided that I will literally have to do everything myself – including cleaning the house from top to bottom, every nook and cranny while I deal with a very cranky, unpredictable baby. I must say that all the running around did not kill me and planning does have its advantage.
However, it is as if I was born to dive into things because while most people plan to buy a house (we did too, actually, we were house-hunting) in a locale they know and like, we bought a house because we had no other choice unless we put off buying a house and move to yet another strange place. We decided to buy this house half hour after we left it with the builder and realtor. Whatever we were looking for in a house that we were actively looking at went out the window. We are now proud homeowners who had to move to an almost strange place. Almost strange place because we did not know the place even existed just miles away from where we used to live and liked.
I planned to move away from my parents and live my own life in a different continent but ended up here, in the United States. I planned not to have children but have two of them, I planned so much and they all came to naught. This is why I decided to do away with planning anything.
H used to lose sleep over something he planned but the plan fell to pieces. I just shrug my shoulders and remind him later on when the same situation arise. I prefer to look back at the mistake I made whether due to planning or the lack of it, and work towards rectifying the situation so as not to make the same mistake. Of course, some mistakes you cannot help but repeat.
These days, I am not planning anything. The last time I planned something, it fell to pieces. That was early this week, by the way.
H’s favourite sister plans for laundry day, checking her emails, and such like. She said that if whatever is not in her planner, she does not do it. We laughed at her checking off her list of things to do each day, every so many hours. I tried that and failed miserably. I forgot I listed a number of things to do on any particular day. I found my planner a week later and laughed at myself.
I often announce if I was going to buy foodstuff and ask Children of the Corn and H if they need anything. Child of the Corn I always has a list of things she “needs” and leaves it on my laptop. This morning I found a list from her and forgot a thing or two. In fact, I forgot I was carrying her list in my bag. The list in my head distracted me.
You see, it is not just planning for the big things like marrying somebody or not having children that disagree with me. It includes little plans and simple lists like groceries.
When you plan something, add other people in the mix, and the plan fall to pieces. You think you are upset, think about those people you included in your planning. You told them, “Hey, let us go do this or that next week, month, year,” those people of course look forward to doing this or that at the appointed time. Something comes up and you are not able to do whatever it was you planned. Those people you included in your plans probably think you are deliberately not intending to do whatever it was you planned. They would be disappointed at not being able to do whatever it is and most definitely in you for going back on your word. I know I would.
I will just go to bed every night and wake up the next morning, and go about my way. If I feel something urgently needs doing, I will jump off my bed and go do it. Otherwise, come hell or high water, I will just not plan for anything.
Julia_HotFish notes to self: must plan not to plan.
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